why ?

Last week we went to a shooting trip in the old city. The trip was such a success.


It happened when we were taking shots of an old traditional house between trees; one of my classmates came and asked me if I have an extra film. I did have one. Each of us had to hand in 4 developed films on Sunday, including at least two from that trip. I asked her how many films she spent till now, she said two. So, I apologized and told her that I need my film. She smiled politely and went. It may be a spare film for this trip but including the two films I had photographed so far, I'll be still missing one film on Sunday. If she was the same, she may go and buy one after the trip, she had plenty of time till Sunday to photograph one film and develop it. But for me, the only place that sells this kind of black and white films is miles and miles far from my house, and I didn't want to endure the pain of going there for the second time in the week. That was how I had thought.


Two days later in the photo lab, I was developing my 4 films, and so was she. I knew that she developed 5 excellent films so any remaining feel of guilt inside me was gone. However, it came back when I started drying my films. One of them only had 4 printable pictures! I had taken the shots of that film the same way I did with the other 3. It had been developed in the same tank with another film, which came out very good, so surely there had been nothing wrong with chemicals. I checked the expiry date of the film and it was alright. So, why my fourth film came out like this? Was it because I had refused to give it to my classmate? But, god, she has 5! Maybe, back then, she had felt so inspired and had been to take extra great shots if only I had given her the film but simply I hadn't? Or maybe it's the mere chance? But how come, while there had been not a single logical reason for the film to be damaged?

If anyone knows why, please let me know.